Leading and Love

Oftentimes marriage conflict pushes us so close to the “point-of-no-return” that we need a lifebuoy to help us get back to what was the relationship.

When you are upset, distressed, afraid, or overrun with chaos, you can become overwhelmed and uncooperative. A stroppy or unresponsive person can complicate the rescue process. 

It’s always easier to rescue someone who wants to be rescued and contributes to their rescuing.

Idea #1

Therapy helps those who help themselves. We were in a marriage seminar once and somebody stated that the therapist is responsible for mending a failing marriage. This is very far from reality. A doctor can stitch up the wound then demand that you remain in bed to continue healing, but he can't make you stay in bed. Similarly, a therapist can help you intervene in the conflict and provide step-by-step guidance, but he can't make you solve the issues.

Idea #2

A therapist is more like a facilitator, not a detective. If you lie to her, you will get lost in the lie. If you are truthful, she will guide you in truth. If you seek therapy, you must predetermine your outcome.

Quote #1

“Therapy is like a toothbrush. You can’t really put it to use for anybody but yourself.” -Linda Holmes

Quote #2

"Therapy's like going to the gym." -Chris Pine

Quote #3

“There’s nothing wrong or weak about seeking a therapist. I have a therapist.” -Dan Reynolds

Challenge

Go see a therapist even if you feel fine.

Affirmation

I seek help because I want to become stronger.