Leading and Love

Activities, Travel & Vacation

The Leadership Myth of Constant Motion

For many working couples in leadership, rest feels counterintuitive. In a world that rewards hustle, availability, and output, leisure often gets pushed to the margins—something you do if there’s time left over. But in relationships that are built to last, rest isn’t an afterthought. It’s a rhythm. And not just any rhythm—but one that restores, reconnects, and realigns you with what matters most.

The myth that constant motion equals greater productivity is deeply embedded in many high-achievers. But the truth is, without intentional pauses, even the most successful leaders lose clarity, empathy, and connection—both at work and at home.

Leisure as a Leadership Discipline

Intentional leisure is more than just taking a break. It’s choosing to make space for what refreshes your body, mind, and spirit. It's about designing rhythms—not escapes—that bring restoration.

This kind of leisure is proactive. It asks:

• What brings me joy without requiring performance?
  
  

• What helps us reconnect as a couple without pressure?
  
  

• What activities leave me better than they found me?
  
  

When you think of leisure as leadership maintenance, not indulgence, it becomes easier to defend and prioritize.

Daily and Weekly Rhythms That Replenish

Restoration doesn’t require long vacations or silent retreats. It starts with small, recurring moments built into your rhythm. A 20-minute morning walk. A shared playlist on the drive home. Turning off devices during dinner. These acts don’t interrupt your life—they sustain it.

For couples, even a short shared ritual—like a morning coffee check-in or a Friday evening wind-down—can become a protective rhythm that anchors your connection during busy weeks.

The key is consistency. Restoration comes less from intensity and more from repetition.

The Restorative Power of Play

One of the most overlooked aspects of intentional leisure is play. Not productivity disguised as fun, but true play—activities done for the sheer joy of doing them. Board games. Dancing in the kitchen. Paddleboarding. Throwing a ball at the park.

Play disarms the stress we carry into our homes. It invites laughter. It lowers defensiveness. And, according to psychologist Stuart Brown, it fosters trust and creativity—qualities essential in both marriage and leadership.

Couples who play together create emotional memory banks that buffer against stress. These lighthearted moments serve as a counterbalance to the serious work of life.

Sabbath as a Sacred Rhythm

For many faith-based couples, Sabbath offers a biblical and deeply restorative framework for intentional leisure. It’s not just a day off. It’s a weekly pause that says, we are more than what we produce.

Sabbath rhythms might include time in nature, reflective reading, extended meals, naps, or worship. The point isn’t to be inactive—but to be unhurried. To set apart time where rest, reflection, and reconnection are not squeezed in, but given space to breathe.

This practice reinforces a powerful truth: we lead better when we live from rest, not just toward it.

Making Space for What Matters Most

The biggest barrier to intentional leisure is not time—it’s belief. Do we believe rest is productive? Do we believe our relationship deserves unstructured space? Do we believe we’re more than what we accomplish?

When couples shift this mindset, they begin to build lives of margin and meaning. They stop waiting for burnout to give them permission to slow down. Instead, they create rhythms that make restoration part of their leadership rhythm.

Restoration Is the Work

A relationship that is built to last will not survive on discipline and drive alone. It needs laughter. Stillness. Uninterrupted time. It needs leisure that is chosen, protected, and shared.

Because in the end, love thrives not just in what we achieve together—but in how we rest together.